In Canada, bronze is the new gold. The U.S. blew the Chinese and the rest of the world out of the water with 104 medals including 46 gold. All the great white north could muster was one lousy gold—on the trampoline no less—and 18 medals in all. 12 of them were bronze. Now, I’m not complaining. I’m not. It’s just that the media hype and expectations for success in London were so over the top these results are down right laughable.
CTV and the other Olympic shills contend Canada finished 13th in the medal standings. I’m sorry, but if you go to the official Olympic standings, Canada is way down the list at 36th. And that’s because we’re counting total medals. The Olympics rank by gold medals. And that’s what really counts. Gold. Jamaica got more golds than us. So did Poland and Turkey and even North freakin’ Korea. Are you kidding me? Our top Canuck medal hopes crashed and burned. Whitfield hit a speed bump in the triathlon. Connaughton cost us a medal by stepping on the line in the relay. In true Canadian fashion he profusely apologized. The biggest highlight was our ladies’ soccer team who got gypped on the pitch.
All in all, it was a bloody brilliant Olympic games. The Brits did a great job. Not much scandal, save for those sissy badminton players tanking on purpose. Usain Bolt is still awesome. Michael Phelps was born with gills. And Mexico beating Brazil in men’s soccer was a terrific result for such a messed up country. Way to go London. It truly was a gold medal performance. Or as we call it in Canada, bronze.