It's tough out there in traffic. It can be a mean high-speed world or a frustrating overly-tense low speed world. Don't even get me started on parking lots.

Perhaps that's why we need the KNIGHT XV, the first ultra-luxurious, fully armored, yet environmentally-respectful handcrafted SUV. The latest from Conquest Vehicles, a Toronto-base company, starts at around $630,000, so I assume only serious inquiries are entertained.

MILEAGE?

The SUV is based on a Ford F-550 Super Duty commercial truck chassis and then all resemblance to a mommy/daddy soccer vehicle ends. It comes fully armored, blast-resistant tires, (4 wheel drive of course), front and rear night-vision cameras, exterior searchlights and more. I am not sure how many cup holders.

The interior is only the finest grade leather, 2+2 seating, retractable flat screens, a partition between front and rear cabins, touch screen technology for driver and passengers and enough doo-dads (perhaps not the official terminology) to impress any big time buyer.

Obviously one would think that somewhere in the world, there are people who actually might need this combination of might and protection and luxury. Fair enough. What is somewhat mystifying is that Conquest is coming out with another model of the KNIGHT XV, called The Evade. It's exactly like the tough forerunner but not armored. It will run you about $50K less. I have no idea where you'd get this thing serviced or what else comes with that price tag. You'd think at least some free oil changes. Btw, it comes in gas or diesel.

Even with no armor I imagine there's some gangsta who can't wait to put out the half a million dollars for this vehicle. I mean those Hummer buyers didn't just disappear like the company did. It's ugly, it's brutal, but if there wasn't a market would they be making them?

I guess the mentality is, "If I survive Armageddon, I can't be without a car." LEAVE COMMENTS.

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This promo video is for an older model.